Rooted Hearts

 Relationships have ebbs and flows. They can bring the highest of high and the lowest of lows.  They can bring heartbreak and elation. I guess the reason for this - when you are in the lowest, you can appreciate and grow when the healing begins. Realizing without the sadness and growth you can never fully appreciate the true joy that follows. Always trust in God, he creates the rainbows.  Hollow My heart is empty like a piece of hollow wood carved out by your words. A wall between us made by bricks of apathy cemented in time. The flowers have died candles melted into pools of tears. How I wish for Spring freshness washing over us growing into new love. But that is just a precarious dream. A dream and a prayer I carry  in my  hollow heart.

  I have recently been diagnosed with a degenerative nerve disease, Axonal Sensory Polyneuropathy. What that means is that my nerves have been destroyed or affected in several areas. This is a progressive disease, and there is no cure, just palliative care. Does this scare me, in a way, the unknown is always scary, but I need to accept it, I pray each day for acceptance to be planted on my heart. But I have already begun to feel the pangs of this disease. I have numbness and tingling in my hands and feet, weakness in my hands and legs, and sharp jolts that go down my legs. I should be using a cane, but I refuse to give into  it. No way! There will be time enough for that as things progress. Right now, I am fighting it every inch of the way. I gather my strength each day by my love for my family and friends, as well as, meditation, prayer, and immersing myself into His word.  I tell you this because part of my fight involves joining a gym and hiring a traine...

  So often we overlook what may be going on in each other's lives. A seemingly simple interaction could have implications far beyond what that encounter seemed to be. And so it was, I believe, with a chance encounter I had in the Aldi parking lot this week.  The Quarter I have been to Aldi thousands of times. I know that I need to have a quarter handy unless I want to juggle my groceries while I walk through the store. The carts stand front and center as you enter the store. You place a quarter in the slot of the cart, and it is released for your use. When you are finished you re-attach the cart in the corral and your quarter is returned. Often, if you are lucky, you can catch someone about to return their cart, simply hand over your quarter, and use their cart without all of the fuss of getting the cart to begin with. There have been many occasions I have been returning my cart and I just give it to the next person. I tell them to pay it forward ...

  This is a picture of my husband Doug as a baby. I love his effervescence, and unbridled smile. I wish I could turn back time, before he was sick, and know that smile again, and feel that effervescence. But life is complicated, and not always fair, and Doug has had many years battling a disease that seems relentless. One thing it hasn't taken is our Faith. God has cared for us with his gentle hands, never letting go, guiding us faithfully to him in a harbor of safety and love.  Follow The sky will open heaven's door, Birds fly in sacred scores. The moon will pour a path to grace, I will follow. Your name, my only song, prayer melting into words, voices silent nevermore. I will follow. Cover me in your divine, wrap me in immortal. May I reach a soul despair - All I ask; is you, to follow.

  I wrote this poem for my Godmother when she died. She was an incredible force in my life, and at times, I don't think I told her or showed her enough. She was beautiful, elegant and poised.  Now, like this bird in my Granddaughter Natalee's painting she is free, and ever gorgeous.  Celestine in Heaven     I say goodbye with a prayer,   A woman like you, so very rare .   The stars will whisper your name through night,   The pain once felt no longer fight.    Angels surround you in heavens song   No longer here, but not yet gone.   I will close my eyes to see   All the years you had with me.    Now you rest in God’s embrace,   Our hearts filled with your grace.    Looking up to heavens sent,   Eyes on you already meant .    Farwell for now, you must go    And I, in time, will surely grow.    Until we stand in just one light,    I will carry you, near an...

  Growing up my mother always told me; To have a friend is to be a friend. Later on, in girl scouts - we sang out; Make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver, the other is gold. I suppose we have all heard many metaphors for friendship through life, but one thing for certain, none of them capture the true essence of what it is.  Friendship is a sacred trust between two people (or more) that surpasses any jingle or song.  My friends are nothing short of blessings in my life. After my husband Doug became sick, I saw first-hand the fragility of life. One day he was a working, volunteering, coaching, man. In a million years never did I dream he would eventually be disabled. And never did I dream that this tragedy that had entered our lives would turn out to be pure Grace! It brought me to my knees and covered me in humility. Suddenly, all of the things I thought important were mere obstacles in my new journey. It was then I vowed to reconnect w...

  Melting The snow fell softly Insinuating itself onto naked branches. Slowly, melting into the  earth nourishing the rebirth of  Spring. Teri Carlson

  This was Matthew's little dog when he was small. He carried it everywhere. It had a secret zipper in it where he carefully guarded whatever change he had. It is tattered and torn, yet very well loved. As humans I believe we often feel that way - pulled in many directions, weary of the demands that are put upon us, but at the end of the day as we sink into contentment, we always feel well loved.  Daniel, the young man I wrote about in this post could have very well been in the category of overwhelmed. He was being spread in many directions and gave up a life he had created to help his mother. Like Matt's little dog, he was well loved. Last night as I got to work and walked outside, the dark and the cold greeted me like an unwanted intruder. I made my way over to Walmart for some chicken noodle soup (a kind request from my sick husband). The parking lot was in its usual disarray of cars and people, children darting in and out...and after my 11 hour shift my patience...

I realize this photo has nothing to do with the story I am about to tell you, but it is one of my favorite pictures of my so Matthew as a baby. You need to relish the small stuff as you forge your way through life and realize that sometimes it will have greater impact on you than the greater things you may encounter. And so, it was with Donald and the huge blessing I was given in a very unassuming package. Donald     This morning as I walked to my car after getting a hot chocolate, I glanced across the field at the flashing red and white lights of an ambulance. It was parked at the local retirement home. This is really not a “retirement home “.    It isn't as though the residents play shuffleboard , or mind endless hours in bridge games. It is, rather, a place where people go to die. I know this because when I was 18, I worked as a CNA in the local hospital. On a regular basis we received patients from that very home. One day I was assigned to one of its res...