Curve Balls and Spring Rain

 

Like a curve ball that doesn’t make it across home plate, or a Spring without rain, we are sometimes left to wonder whether God has heard our prayers.

Often people imagine a Santa like figure in heaven keeping track of who has been naughty or nice. But reality is our God is ever knowing, he doesn’t need to keep track! More like a patient parent waiting for you to come willingly to him with your pain, God is doing the same.

I remember when I was very young and would pray. I would pray for ridiculous things and expect them to appear as if it were magic. Afterall, if blind men could see and the lame could walk, what was a little Barbie doll appearing in my room? And that  was how my immature mind thought of God, like a magician. One night I knelt next to my bed and began to pray out loud as my parents made their way upstairs. I don’t remember my exact words but ended it by saying I was in awe of God and his magical ways. My mother turned white as my dad’s teeth dropped. This went against all they had taught me thus far, not to mention my Catholic schooling. My parents scolded me, and I was told in no uncertain terms to never refer to God and the word magic in the same statement again. I remember being confused by how my parents reacted, wondering why what I had said was wrong. To an immature faith, miracles and magic might be synonymous.

Prayers are not always answered in our time, or in our way. Our Father knows what we need, even if we don’t see it at first. I have a banner on my computer that reads Pray.Wait.Trust. Waiting is not one of my strong suits, and although I attempt to leave my prayer with God, I also lose patience and attempt to take it back giving myself the control over it. That certainly never ends well, and I ultimately go back in prayer, giving it right back to God.

When I am feeling particularly lost, or worried about money and lift this in prayer, I am almost always answered in an unexpected way. My child like self would expect to win the lottery or another windfall of money, which has never been the case. Instead, God gives me an incredible appreciation for all I have. As I slip into bed at night, I realize how very fortunate I am to be surrounded by such comfort. Or I look around my home and see all that I have that is extra, realizing so many would be happy to have a fraction of what I have. Soon, I am saying a prayer of thanksgiving, instead of focusing on what I think I need.

Prayer is one of our greatest intimacies, words shared between us and our Father. They are curated in the quiet of our heart and put forth by our soul. No matter how far away God may seem, he is only a whisper away. The curve ball may not always make it across the plate, the earth may not always be drenched by spring rain, but God is ever there, ever listening to every prayer.